Sobriety Navigator: Drug addiction and the strength of defiance!
No one likes to be told what to do and nowhere is this more evident than in the lives of addicts. We pride ourselves on our, “the rules don’t apply to me,” attitude, or, in some cases, the “outlaw” mentality. It’s all part of the cover-up and illusion of being in control. But it is just that; an illusion. What is really in control is a mentally and emotionally arrested adult, held hostage to an adolescent mentality who’s only coping skill is self-medicating.
Addicts think backwards. They defy society and it's rules. In reality, they must learn to stop defying their true selves and their entire life experience, and learn to defy the drugs. Stop giving them power to control and dictate every thought and action. Let’s face it, if we’re not using, we’re thinking about using. It dictates who we associate with and who we don’t. It dictates where we go and where we won’t. And more often than not, it will lead us to places we never dreamed we would go.
When we finally reach the point in our addiction that we are at risk of losing everything or have lost everything (family, friends, jobs, our teeth, our standing in the community, our freedoms) and our life hangs in the balance, we can do one of two things: keep going to the end, or begin to defy the drugs and toxic life style it creates.
Instead of completing the path to self-destruction, utilize a self-help program and develop a positive, defiant attitude toward drugs. Defy the addiction and the self-destructive thoughts and behaviors that fuel the cycles of addiction and run roughshod over us.
When hit in the face (like a shovel) with negative thoughts of self-condemnation, we defy these thoughts by doing things that enhance, empower and prove to ourselves that we are not less than or bad or no good. We seek out people who are successfully abstaining from drugs and learn to develop new coping skills to combat the “enemy” that is in our brain and rules our life. We learn to stop listening to it by focusing on the solutions.
No guts, no glory. When a fear surfaces, we defy it by facing it head on. We talk about it with a trusted friend or confidant. When overwhelmed with anger, defy it by not acting out on the anger. Instead, we own it, claim it, talk about it and work off the energy.
Whatever thoughts or feelings fuel your desire to self-medicate, defy them by doing just the opposite of what you’ve been doing. Don’t isolate. Meet with others who understand and will not judge, shame, or condemn you. Stand up to your mental tormentors. Then, watch them lose their power.
By Cynthia Peterson